Wednesday, May 09, 2007

Soon to come: My first MOTHERS DAY!

Well Sunday will be MY FIRST MOTHERS DAY! I'm very excited, though I know obviously D is too young to know it, so I won't get anything, but thats fine. Because the important part is just going to be celebrating the day, not that I don't really celebrate it EVERY I think, that when you adopt, motherhood takes on a whole new meaning for you. Sure, when you give birth, you are more physically connected to the child, but I know from personal experience, its different. I TOTALLY fell in love with D from our first meeting. Before I had even MET him, God put those feelings in me. His foster parents took him on vacation for a week a few weeks before I was to meet him, and I MISSED him so bad. And I had never met him. But I think that with adoption, you work so hard to get this child that you don't know, that you almost kind of
cherish these moments MORE. Now I haven't been through not being able to have children, but I bet that after knowing you can't, adoption takes on even more meaning.

Maybe I'm just rambling here, I'm not explaining how I feel very well and obviously having never been pregnant or given birth, I don't know how it feels. But I do think that motherhood through adoption is a different feeling than through birth. Not better, not worse, just different. And I missed the first 2 years of his life. All those firsts. And I grieve for those sometimes, but man, how I cherish the times I have with him now.

I just look at him in awe and wonder sometimes that God (and the state of would gift me with this special little boy. I know he has delays and issues, but I wholeheartedly feel that God has something special for him. That he will be used to touch people's lives in ways they could never imagine. Shoot, he already does that. People have asked me if we ever get looked at odd, for being a transracial adoption, but ya know, D just has such a personality that people never get a chance to. He is always talking to people at the store or wherever we are, and he charms them. I see great things ahead for him!

Anywho, y'all have a great rest of the week, I prolly won't update again til after this weekend. We might go to the lake, but I'm thinkin I wanna stay here and enjoy the day with just me and D. Maybe go swimming or play with friends, who knows.

I'm out...

1 comment:

Ringmaster K said...

Awww! That's right- it will be your first mom's day!
Although I don't know exactly how it feels to be an adoptive mom- I know that I see pure MOMMY when you and D are together.
You've got the love part down good, girl!

See ya tomorrow!